I knew in the middle of the night last night exactly what I would be doing this AM. Today is payday and kind of a tongue in cheek situation in this household. We have just been squeaking by - barely. And the other day I became sad at a statement I made; "We just have to make it through August and then I will be working more come Sept." But August is a cosmic celebration and something to embrace not endure. So yes Sept I will be working more and I have chosen to make these last few weeks of August amazing, and to do it on a dime (at the very least 9 cents).
I didn't food shop last week in an effort to shore up funds as we are a mortgage payment behind. Some missed work in part due to an injury in other working for a small business that shut down a bit more frequently this year. I believe adjustments will be made in the next few weeks to rectify the latter and I am grateful to say the injury has been reduced to a soreness and is evaporating nicely!
I chose not to take a second job in the last two months. The job that I would've taken is slow in coming and I am taking that as one of those 'perfect timing' things - it will come through when it is supposed to or something else will. I have irons in the fires and am doing all I can. I have learned when I do this and remain positive and open things happen as they are meant to. Does being a payment behind on the mortgage bother me? Yes and no. It does in that part of me that wants to be perfect and have life go according to the script but the part of me that understands life knows that sometimes you are ahead and (like right now) sometimes you are behind. Should I waste precious energy in worry? No. I am a productive creature and have the ability to roll with these punches. I am determined not to let it devastate a beautiful day.
So what did I do to offset this last month? Well a few months ago when things were rolling along and prosperous I put a bit aside to ensure gas in the car, food on the table (prepper), lights staying on. It was a bit scary as I saw the emergency fund take a hit, and then another, and then another...
Ironically it was a conscious decision NOT to food shop and to exist this past week on what we had here. The ironic thing was that our area is starting to harvest, and I work in a doctors office -smack in the middle of farm land. Farmers by nature are a sharing bunch. Two shoprite plastic bags of fresh produce made its way to my table. Things are provided in the most unexpected ways sometimes. There was an abundance of small pickling cucumbers, in my recipe for pickles you could use grape leaves or oak. I have only used grape because all of the oak trees around here seem established enough to put their leaves far out of the reach of a hobbit sized girl like me...
Anyway, I took the kayak out at the crack of dawn and stuffed it with water, a fantastic book (The History of the Future by James Howard Kunstler) and hot cup of coffee. The water seemed in turmoil this morning - a bit rough and undecided in its currents. I paddled around the perimeter of the lake and ventured all the way to the tip where a house sits 50 feet from very shallow rocky swamp water we walked in as kids and caught turtles and tadpoles - before everyone was afraid of everything natural and pesticides reigned supreme. Along the shore to my right the trees lit up with light like torches hugging the shoreline. I lay my paddle in the water and turned the boat in one swoop. The sun had broken through and the water calmed as though happy to see it. It seemed a celebratory moment for sure.
I paddled back toward the huge granite stone we jumped off of as kids - stolen nights and time with lukewarm beer. Soft memories now. I noticed the turtles had come out deciding, after all, to sun their shells. As I rounded the stone I found myself in a partial tunnel of branches, bright with sun and laden with acorns. Oak leaves. In easy reach. There for the picking.
Things are provided in the most unexpected ways sometimes. Stay open.
Namaste
